While you may think you’ve found your potential wife or lover from among an array of online dating sites dedicated to Asian women interested in Western men, you’re still going to need to utilize the arts of conversation and etiquette to keep her interest.
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The first steps in Asian online dating
To wit, unless the woman in question has outright declared that she’s interested in a rich sugar daddy, don’t bother beating your proverbial chest by declaring you’ve got a boat, a pool, etc. The only thing such gestures tend to convey to this woman you’re interested in is an intention to purchase her like some sort of stock or commodity.
The next thing to be aware of is that English is not the world’s first language. Yes, many foreign cultures study it in order to communicate, but sometimes a particular individual’s proficiency is about as fluent as an 30-year-old American tasked with speaking Spanish when his only exposure to it was back in high school.
Basically, avoid all manner of slang, idioms, or linguistic quirks. However, you should also bear in mind that this woman has some intelligence; intelligence that shouldn’t be insulted with letters that read like a children’s book.
Honesty is a key!
Speaking of literature, while it’s a nice and personal gesture to use a woman’s name throughout your correspondence, make sure that you’ve properly changed it in each relevant section before printing it off. This piece of knowledge is only of merit to those individuals who prefer to “bird dog” their approach, hoping at least one female, out of countless others, will reply with interest.
Additionally, DON’T try to pressure or otherwise convince the woman that you are The One; that any other man who writes to her is on a fruitless quest and barking up the wrong tree. It anything, this just conveys a feeling of insecurity and may very well cost you your chance with that woman.
"Forbidden” topics in the first letter
While you may strike up a lengthy correspondence that can eventually even lead to meeting in person, the first step of that life experience begins with your first letter. As such, there are several things that you may wish to divulge, but it just isn’t proper to do so.
Some of these “forbidden” topics include:
- How your divorce, if any, has affected you.
- Your general experience with other women, including other Asian women who were in search of a husband and bad memories from online dating. You want your first letter to be about yourself and comments about her as a person.
- You stereotype Asian women as a whole. If you have already written her off as a stereotype, that sort of thinking will likely go both ways and cost you.
- You mention anything even remotely sexual. If you’re seeking a wife, would you invest in someone who puts out on the very first date?
- Any other pervasively negative element in your life, such as chronic health problems or work issues.
In short, be honest and be positive.
About the editor: Krystyna has published over 500 articles related to international dating in English and German. In her regularly updated blog posts, Krystyna shows a good eye for online dating topics, romance scams and cross-cultural relationships.
As the leading International Dating Expert and Dating Coach Krystyna is involved in a wide variety of different areas, such as personal dating coaching, online dating and matchmaking.
Need dating coaching? Check here: www.krioda.com
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